Dear Graduates,
I know this is unexpected.
You were probably hoping for a famous author, a local leader, or at least someone with thumbs. But no … you get me. A moth.
Let me introduce myself.
I am one of those little creatures that fly around your porch light at night. You’ve seen me. You’ve probably waved me away. You may have even yelled, “AHH! A bug!”
But I kept coming back.
Not because I’m stubborn (which I am). Not because I’m confused (which I also am). But because I’m drawn to the light.
And you are too.
Today, you sit on the edge of what’s next. The edge of adulthood. The edge of tomorrow. The edge of your seat, because, let’s be honest, these folding chairs weren’t designed with comfort in mind.
Change is terrifying, isn’t it?
I know what it’s like to be on the edge of something new. To leave the safety of the screen door and head into the wild unknown. Wings wobbly. Heart buzzing. Moon calling.
A lot of people think moths are just broken butterflies. They act like we somehow lost the metamorphosis lottery. We’re just the less lovely night shift. Not so.
Yes, we were caterpillars too. We also worked, strained, and struggled. We waited and became something else. Now we fly.
We don’t fly for attention. We don’t fly for applause. We fly for whatever light calls to us next. I think there’s something admirable about that.
As a proud moth, there’s some things I want to share with you humans about what I’ve learned out there.
Like you, I long for the light. Be warned, though:
It’s easy to fly toward the wrong things. Everyone does sometimes. You might find yourself dazzled by something flashy or fast or false. You’ll think you found the thing and then realize: Nope. Bug zapper.
You might mistake praise for purpose. Attention for affection. Success for meaning.
Chasing the light is what we do.
And learning which kind is worth chasing? That’s the real work.
Some lights are porch lights. Some are car headlights.
Some lights are warm. Some lights are warnings.
Some lights are kind. Some are cruel.
Some lights just want you to see the way to your neighbor’s front steps where maybe you are needed more than you know.
Not everything that glows is good. But the light in every person you meet? That’s worth noticing.
You have to learn to tell the difference. I wish I could give you cheat codes for this. Unfortunately, there's no shortcut, no sparknotes, and no influencer to follow. There is, though, that quiet pull toward what is good, true, and full of light.
If you’re sitting here feeling a little unsure, afraid, or unfinished today? Good. This means you’re still becoming.
I’ve learned a lot about becoming. Growth isn’t just about where you’re headed. It’s about how you begin to see the world along the way.
It’s about starting to notice things. Small things. Sacred things. Dust dancing in sunbeams. The way voices sometimes shake when they say I love you. The way we all carry big, beautiful mysteries inside us.
And one day you will realize the light you were chasing? It was all around you.
You might land in places that scare you, stay too long, or leave too soon. You’re not here to be perfect. You’re here to be. To be real. To get a little lost. To get a little found. To keep going. And to always always always help those around you find their way toward the light.
If you ever forget who you are: Land. Breathe. Look for the light.
And if I may ask you for one small, cosmic request?
Please turn off your porch light when you’re not using it. Gets a little confusing for us little guys seeking something better than bulbs.
We’re out here trying to get to the moon.
And so are you.
I’ll see you there.
Oh, look! You’re glowing.
p.s. Happy graduation season! This time of year, we often hear beautiful butterfly stories from stages. Accomplished. Soaring. Obvious. It made me really want to hear what an overlooked moth might say. Thanks for letting me share these weird little thoughts. If you know someone standing at the edge of what’s next, please pass this along!
Art from our first gallery show is now online!
Some of the pieces from We hope you fail better (including ribbons, paintings, and more) are now available for purchase. Browse or inquire here.
An update on health and healing
Many kind folks have reached out asking about this post. I’m happy to report that the medication and treatments have been working! Hearing so many of your stories of similar situations has been incredibly encouraging. Thankful to not be alone and thankful for all of you.
A small thank you to paid subscribers
I just want to say thank you to those who recently joined the ranks of paid subscribers. Your support helped cover some very real surprise expenses in the last few weeks (dishwasher: broken, car: wouldn’t start). Your support allowed me not to panic, keep showing up, and focus on finishing the newest book. I seriously cannot say thank you enough.
I seriously look forward to this every Tuesday. Thank you for championing moths.
Cheers to the mothamorphis in us all, change that grows us, lights that guide us, books, art, creatives, words and exhibits that encourage us.
So glad to hear the health update as I missed that post in March. Best to you as you continue navigating all of it. I too had face and ear swelling and after a long process found out it’s an allergy to the dyes used to color polyester and other fabrics. Grateful for a great doc, patch testing and 100 percent organic cotton.
Speaking of exhibits. I was in Michigan last week to visit our adult kids. We made our way to Saugatuck, a favorite harbor town to see the exhibit. Wow! Such a gift to experience with people I love. Our daughter who is an oncology nurse loved the ribbons.
Thank you to both you and Kristi for sharing your goodness and creative imaginings!